Wednesday, May 19

A bit of a quandry...

OK, I need to write this out to try and help me come to a descision.

As I've mentioned before I have fibromyalgia. I was diagnosed 12 years ago and whilst I generally get on with life, occasionally, it knocks me flat. Moreso now I'm over 40. There isn't a day where I'm pain free, but some days are a lot easier than others. If I do a bit too much, I'm buggered for a couple of days and have to take it really easy and loads of painkillers.

Now, on to my quandry.

I haven't been employed since I went on maternity leave 5 years ago. I'm happy to be at home and look after Isabelle, and we can manage (just) financially. I have been going in to Isabelle's school one day a week and helping out in her class. Her teacher approached me a while ago and told me how much they enjoyed me working in the class with them. They love my working methods and how I am with the kids, and how much the kids enjoy me being there. All very flattering and made me feel good.

Yesterday I was approached when I picked Isabelle up from school and asked to apply for a job of classroom assistant as the one they currently have is going on maternity leave at the end of term. They want me to cover her job for her, with a possible long term job if she decides not to come back. The job is part time, which would suit me better than full time, but can my body cope with it? I'm not sure how many hours a week (I forogot to ask! doh!). I'm not sure if I could cope with working a full day in a class of 4 and 5 year olds. My hips and back give up after a while if I'm on my feet all the time. I suppose I should ask about the hours really. 

I always worked in childcare while my elder two kids were little, and although my qualifications aren't up to date (as in NVQ's) I do have an NVQ3 in Business Admin from when I was an Office Manager. I have been told though, that for classroom assistant, experience counts more than paper qualifications. Apparently a glowing report has already been put forward by Isabelle's two teachers and the current classroom assistant to the head teacher of the school, which is really nice. I just need to decide whether my body will cope and should I put the application in this afternoon when I go in to help out or not. I suppose it wouldn't hurt. And if I do get the job, it is only temporary and if I can't cope physically, I can tell them. Afterall, I might just be fine.

There see... writing it down did help. 

The Gallery - Me

When Tara at Sticky Fingers announced this week's theme for the gallery, I could practically hear all the gasps from where I sit. This week we have to post a Self Portrait. Now everyone has stopped re-coiling in horror, there are some beautiful faces being posted, so pop over and check out the gallery at Tara's.

The reason we rarely like photographs of ourselves is because that's not how we recognise the face staring back. We're used to seeing ourselves in a mirror, so when you look at a photograph your face doesn't look the way we see it. If you flip the photograph over to mirror image it, you'll feel much more comfortable looking at it because you now recognise yourself. 

Anyway.. my photograph. There really aren't many photographs of me at all. I avoid the camera at all costs, but I did try a self portrait a while ago. Note full makeup and 'done' hair? LOL. It's from about 8 months or so ago, but it's the most recent one I have. 

So this is me, just about 1 year old I think. This was my most favourite thing in the whole world, my teddy chair (yes it really was a chair!)

Me not quite 2 years old.

Again, about 2 I think. I love this photo. As ever, one hair ribbon in, the other vanished for ever.

This one, I was about 4 I think. I was at playschool and I think this one just sums me up. Quite chilled out and relaxed about life. (I've just had to come back and edit this to say that although Isabelle looks very similar to me, she has the exact same head tilt and facial expression that I do here. Spooked me a bit as I've never noticed it before).

 And this is me at 16. It was really sunny hence the squint to my eyes and very white clothes! Check out that 80's hair do LOL. When hubby saw this pic he said "yeah.. I'd have done that!" LOL thanks hun.

 And me today (well, about a year ago actually, my hair is a lot longer now)